Building Bridges

This picture is absolutely one of my wife’s favorite pictures of me. She says it makes her cry sometimes when she looks at it. For the longest of time I couldn’t understand why this picture would make her cry. It was one of the happiest moments in my life. To give you some context allow me to first give you some background on my story. This way you can see the connection the way I see it.

I used to be a hustler, and a selfish one at that. I used to believe it was me against the world. Growing up in an environment where everyday I fought to find acceptance and true love. I found that so called love and acceptance in the streets. Streets where there were many people who looked just like me and had similar stories to the very ones I was running from. Living in this life I learned a code. Something like Proverbs for the streets. This code taught to me by a OG, was a set of rules that every man who chooses this life should follow in order to find success and good karma. Yes in the early 2000s gangstas had consciousness of both life and death. Things were different then.

Your Word Is All You Have

It is well said, “There’s no honor amongst thieves.” That is very true, but when it comes to those who hustle, your word is the only true possession of value. Your word can make or break you. It can protect you and save you during times of possible violence. It can bail you out when you are in trouble. Especially during financial troubles such as times like this. We have quarantines that shut down jobs, and further restrict us from being able to take care of ourselves. During times like this, the more people you have in your corner, the more successful you will be. The streets taught me this in life, and now I will show you why this is so important to learn.

People must learn to value, and appreciate the little things in life. My grandfather always said, “If a man has one friend, he is truly blessed.” I used to think I’m good, I got mad (a lot of) friends. I was in high school back then, and like many life lessons I was given by him, went totally over my head. I didn’t understand what a true friend is. I hadn’t experienced enough life, hadn’t been through enough situations, and most importantly time. I hadn’t experienced time, and what that does to friends and people in general. Understand that a true friend is someone who you don’t even have to speak to everyday, but one day you look up and realize. You realize that everytime you needed something whether it was just a simple ear, or maybe it was advice. Whether through the good times and the bad this person was always there for you with no judgment, no resentment or jealousy. Just plain love. This is when you realize that these simple connections in life are the ones of value. These are the ones that we often take for granted. Took me 30 years, but one day it really took to me, to value and cherish relationships, of all kinds. That’s why I named my organization ALL KINDS. I blossomed through my experiences in life, and now I finally understand the importance of a connection. These connections I like to look at as bridges that allow me to travel across gaps that try to impede my journey!

Bridging The Gap

Back to this photo. As a resource specialist, one of my jobs was finding resources for our tenants, and visitors of the community living room. (Located inside of Reed Manor.) One day Bob, our Feed Thy Neighbor Head Chef, asked me to ride with him to Aunt Millie’s bread store. We get there and it so happens we leave with a massive amount of bread we purchased for hardly nothing. I mean we had so much bread that we filled the entire Jackson Housing Commission van with bread. We passed out so much bread, it made me feel like a much cleaner Nino Brown from New Jack City. You know the scene where he was passing out them turkeys on Thanksgiving! I took this picture to show my wife because she happened to know the lady who worked there. That’s why I was cheesing so hard in this picture. I was stupid filled with joy and happiness. It was a connection, that allowed me to make all of this happen. A connection I made through a friend of a friend. Crazy! This is still mind blowing to me. This side of life is still new to me.

My personal journey has taken me across many paths, obstacles, hurdles, mountains, and just about anything a person could experience in this hamster wheel we call life. Through them, I have evolved from a person who was selfish in nature to a person who cares, and feels the pain of others. This picture constantly reminds me of why it is important to value every relationship with every person you may meet. You never know who will become a resource for you during time of need.

Keeping your word true and always being a good friend in return will allow you to keep, and blossom your relationships. No matter what kind of relationship you are in whether friend, or love. Your partner will want you to treat them as you would want to be treated yourself. That’s the key. Never allow your friend to go unappreciated, and unloved. Let them know sometime that you value their friendship. Let your partner know that you value and cherish their love. This alone is a important step in our bonding connection.

Time’s like this we have to use every resource available. Do not ruin friendships, connections, resources by not doing what you are supposed to do. So many times in life I’ve met young men stuck in situations and I asked them, where are your parents? Where your friends at? You don’t have anyone to call? Almost every time this happens because the person has ruined every connection, every friendship, and every lifeline they used to have. People who struggle with addiction face this reality sooner than most. Learning to appreciate the people you have in your life will get you a long way. No matter if you only have one true friend, remember you are truly blessed.

“People don’t mind helping people who are willing to help themselves.”

My Grandma